Total Access
Purity Girls
Purity 101

The Test of Love

"Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love."   1 John 4:7-8

     One of the most momentous days in a teen girl's life is the day a boy turns to her and pops the "L" word.
     "I love you."
     Coming from the lips of the right guy, those words can make a girl's heart do front flips, back flips and somersaults--all at the same time. It's a feeling that can convince a girl she's fallen in love. But is this wonderful feeling genuine love?
     Who better to answer that question than God? After all, "God is love," and God clearly want us to understand and practice love as His followers. He talks a lot about love in His Word--in fact, my electronic concordance found 468 matches to the word "love" in the Bible.
     So, let's look at the biblical guidelines for understanding love:
   We get our love from God. "We love Him because He       first loved us" (I John 4:19). God is love, He was the first       to practice love, and He is the true measure of what love       is. "Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He       loved us, and sent His Son" (1 John 4:10). When we feel       strong emotions that are impure, they aren't from God,       therefore they aren't true love.
    God wants us to pass His kind of love on to others. "A       new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one       another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.       By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye       have love one to another" (John 13:34-35). God wants us       to share His love with others in such a way that it identifies       us as His disciples. When our "love" makes us do things       that don't glorify God, we can be sure it's not true love.
    Love means giving. "For God so loved the world that He       gave His only begotten Son…" (John 3:16). Look what       happened when God loved. He gave. The Bible teaches       that "where your treasure is, there will your heart be also"       (Mathew 6:21). When you invert that verse, you'll see that       where your heart is, there will your treasure be also. Giving       can mean sacrificing your money, time, and energy. In       Christ's ultimate example, love &meant giving up life itself.
    Love is not based upon the actions of others.       "When Jesus knew that His hour was come that He


      should depart out of this world unto the Father, having       loved His own which were in the world, He loved them       unto the end" (John 13:1b). Looking ahead to the       cross…foreseeing His disciples forsake Him and deny       Him…knowing that onlookers would mock His pain, Jesus       loved people. He felt their rejection, their disloyalty; yet He       loved. Jesus showed by His example that true love is an       action, not a feeling. Love is put to the test when we are       disappointed, disillusioned, or even "grossed out" by our       partner. Only God's kind of love will stand that test.
    Unsaved people can't possess true love. "Every one       that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God" (1 John       4:7b). Only people who have admitted their need for a       Saviour, only those who God has forgiven and adopted       into His family, can truly understand love. Since we       understand love by understanding God, and since we get       love from God, it's absolutely necessary to have that       spiritual connection. That's why the Bible instructs us not to       be "unequally yoked with unbelievers" (2 Corinthians       6:14), because an unsaved boy can sincerely think he's in       love, but he'll never know love until he knows God.

     How does your love measure up to God's standard? If your crush doesn't pass the love test of God's Word, then it's just that--a crush. While crushes are part of the emotional rollercoaster of the teens and twenties, they should never be the catalyst for a major life decision such as marriage or physical intimacy. That's because although the feelings involved with a crush can be very real and very powerful, without the fuel of selfless giving, your crush will eventually fade. One day you or your spouse will suddenly realize that you've "fallen out of love," and your marriage will become yet another sad divorce statistic.
     Girls, it's impossible to "fall out of" Christ's love. If it were, He most assuredly would have "fallen out of love" with the human race as people mocked and crucified Him. God's love for you is eternal, and your love for your sweetheart will be as well if you both agree to get your love from God, share God's love with each other, and love through selfless giving that's not contingent upon receiving anything in return.

Previous Total Access Next