One of the most momentous
days in a teen girl's life is the day a boy turns to her and pops
the "L" word.
"I love you."
Coming from the lips of the right
guy, those words can make a girl's heart do front flips, back flips
and somersaults--all at the same time. It's a feeling that can convince
a girl she's fallen in love. But is this wonderful feeling genuine
Who better to answer that question
than God? After all, "God is love," and God clearly want us to understand
and practice love as His followers. He talks a lot about love in
His Word--in fact, my electronic concordance found 468 matches to
the word "love" in the Bible.
So, let's look at the biblical guidelines
for understanding love:
our love from God. "We love Him because
He first loved us" (I John 4:19). God is love,
He was the first to practice love, and He is the true
measure of what love is. "Herein is love, not that
we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His
Son" (1 John 4:10). When we feel strong emotions
that are impure, they aren't from God, therefore
they aren't true love.
wants us to pass His kind of love on to others.
"A new commandment I give unto you, That ye
love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also
love one another. By this shall all men know that
ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another"
(John 13:34-35). God wants us to share His
love with others in such a way that it identifies us
as His disciples. When our "love" makes us do things
that don't glorify God, we can be sure it's not true
means giving. "For God so loved the world that
He gave His only begotten Son…" (John 3:16). Look
what happened when God loved. He gave. The
Bible teaches that "where your treasure is, there
will your heart be also" (Mathew 6:21). When you
invert that verse, you'll see that where your heart is,
there will your treasure be also. Giving can mean sacrificing
your money, time, and energy. In Christ's ultimate
example, love &meant giving up life itself.
is not based upon the actions of others. "When
Jesus knew that His hour was come that He
out of this world unto the Father, having loved
His own which were in the world, He loved them unto
the end" (John 13:1b). Looking ahead to the cross…foreseeing
His disciples forsake Him and deny Him…knowing
that onlookers would mock His pain, Jesus loved
people. He felt their rejection, their disloyalty; yet He loved.
Jesus showed by His example that true love is an action,
not a feeling. Love is put to the test when we are disappointed,
disillusioned, or even "grossed out" by our partner.
Only God's kind of love will stand that test.
people can't possess true love. "Every one that
loveth is born of God, and knoweth God" (1 John 4:7b).
Only people who have admitted their need for a Saviour,
only those who God has forgiven and adopted into
His family, can truly understand love. Since we understand
love by understanding God, and since we get love
from God, it's absolutely necessary to have that spiritual
connection. That's why the Bible instructs us not to be
"unequally yoked with unbelievers" (2 Corinthians 6:14),
because an unsaved boy can sincerely think he's in love,
but he'll never know love until he knows God.
How does your love measure up to God's
standard? If your crush doesn't pass the love test of God's Word,
then it's just that--a crush. While crushes are part of the emotional
rollercoaster of the teens and twenties, they should never
be the catalyst for a major life decision such as marriage or physical
intimacy. That's because although the feelings involved with a crush
can be very real and very powerful, without the fuel of selfless
giving, your crush will eventually fade. One day you or your spouse
will suddenly realize that you've "fallen out of love," and your
marriage will become yet another sad divorce statistic.
Girls, it's impossible to "fall out
of" Christ's love. If it were, He most assuredly would have "fallen
out of love" with the human race as people mocked and crucified
Him. God's love for you is eternal, and your love for your sweetheart
will be as well if you both agree to get your love from God, share
God's love with each other, and love through selfless giving that's
not contingent upon receiving anything in return.